i'm JUMPING out the window with this one!

omgah!
i have so much to sayyy!

man,
i fuckin started shaking.
wtf is wrong with me?

okay!
agah!

I kind of took a a step back and analyzed everything.
I'm realizing that I'm actually making an effort to changing what I wanted changed.

Not everything,
but the main important one...

I'm pretty comfortable with myself right now,
not fully, but it's getting there.
i've had personal improvements.

[hmm, pizza fries! =]]

like i unintentionally do this thing where I pick and choose where I act like myself and where I just sit there based on my environment.
i'm pretty sure i'm not the only person who does that,
but it fricken bugs me.

...but now i'm making adjustments to that.

However, I think i'm making a couple of things awkward.

i was gonna vaguely say this,
but idc anymore.
lol

things are really drifting w/ me and di.
ha, and i thought i was the only one who noticed it.
idk, i think things are kinda weird now.
we don't even talk that much anymore... =/
but bleh.
maybe things will get better.

Man, things have been so boring.
i need some positive excitement.
ooo, tell me that i won $3000 or that like my 'purple' theory has followed through.
hehe

speaking of 'purple'!
boys do nothing for me right now except for di.
&i've become like reallly informally infatuated w/ her.
i think it's b/c she reminds me of rihanna and i'm kind of on her right now.
but gahgahgahgah
one day! one day!
don't kill my dreams.
=]]]]]

i really aspire to be a hippie
or something close to it!
i think i have a hippe type of nature,
right?
lol, idk why it intrigues me so much.

like don't hippies think unrealisticly or some shit;
like everything is gonna resolve to peace, love and happiness?
i think that!!!!
hmph.
*folds arms*

i don't think they curse alot though,
&i wanna have a sailor mouth.
gahgah

ahh, so today when me and my mom were walking out of walmart this old homeless guy asked us for some spare change.
i don't see how people can just say no and walk away knowing that they have some extra money in their pocket.
everytime someone less fortunate than me ask me for a dollar or two i feel really bad if i don't give it to them.
gahh, like i couldn't say no to the man!!

my mom said it had to do w/ me being a christian which led to a blahblah christian lecture.
but i just think it's b/c i have a big heart and i'm sticking with that!
thats hippie like right?
sadsad.

me and mom aren't necessarily 'close'

i notice that how morgs and her mom are really close,
she tells her mom everything.
i don't have that with my mom.
like i don't really tell her any personal junk.
i kinda keep it generic with her.

idky i don't tell her anything.
hmmm.
thats needs to CHANGE!

i try sometimes. =/

but today when me and my mom were at the hair salon,
i felt mother daughterly bonding going on!
hehe, it was grand.

speaking of my hairrr,
agah!
i went to this new guy.
i mainly wanted to go to him b/c he doesn't use gel at all,
and i fricken hate gel,
i hate how it makes my hair feel.
and it dries my scalp.

so likeee i got him to do my hair.
and it's niice and all.
but the only fricken thing is the front of my hair looks like something formally done for a presidents wife!
>;o

lol, like wtf was he looking at when i showed him my rihanna picture?
it's not bad, but it doesn't look edgy!

but i really wanna go back to him b/c of the no gel thing!!
imma need him to be on his game!

but i'll deal.
beggers can't be choosers.

my sis bday is next weekend.
now that i have a job i can get her something pretty sweet.
i'm still thinking about what that is...
we have the same taste,
but i don't wanna get her something i might like too
b/c we'd pretty much end up sharing it.
tisktisk.
so i'm still thinking.

ooo, one more thing!
music.
my insanley uber cool music has been making me feel pretty strong lately.

i think it's kind of weird b/c it isn't al x. j.
i actually haven't listened to her in a while,
b/c she annoys me right about now.
but that always happens.

but anyway,
yeahh.
like ahh.
musicmusicmusic.
makes me feel somekindaway.

whew,
i feel extremly oppy!

*checks*

yeahh, i'm pretty much done.
idk when imma blog again.

*edited*
ohhh btw;
me and cia saw this hawtness guy on the bus today.
lol, boom wanted us to take a pic.
of course that didn't happen.
cia was about to poop in the bottle &shit.
lmfaoooo!
hehe,
but yo had a girl.
tisktisk.

i'm done. =]

peace <3